I’m not usually a big one for the numbered lists of “Things You Should Do” to improve this, that, or the other thing that seem to be all the rage on social media these days. Once in a while, however, something comes across my desktop that seems to actually have some good, practical ideas ? not completely fleshed out, mind you, but enough to start a person thinking about things that might be worth… well, thinking about, at the very least, and perhaps actually experimenting with introducing as change processes within struggling or stuck relationships.

I admit it, I also like this one for the unabashedly Buddhist approach to relationships. Every one of these twenty items is a “special project” unto itself, and even as a student of Buddhism I have to admit I’m not always as good at some of these as I’d ultimately like to be. But as Pema Chodron writes, sometimes we just have to start where we are, and not wait until some future-perfect moment that always seems to be just over the horizon, never nearer or further away than an excuse to not start today, right now.

As Lao Tzu wrote, “The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step”. Any one of these twenty suggestions starts with such simple movements towards change.